“Why do I have pain with sex?”
Or, “why do I have pelvic pain?” This is the most common question I hear.
And the answer is, “probably for a lot of reasons.”
Let me explain.
This is when I typically explain the role of pelvic floor dysfunction in the pain threshold, or the point where you feel pain. Any problems and dysfunction below the threshold aren’t associated with pain yet, but as soon as you go above the threshold, you have pain.
Probably at some point you had pelvic floor dysfunction issues that didn’t cause pain.
A common example is chronic constipation. Maybe it got a little better with diet and exercise changes or maybe you didn’t make any changes…after all, you weren’t in pain. You were still below your pain threshold.
Then maybe you were physically injured.. Maybe you fell on your bottom, hurting your tailbone, hip, or back, and you tightened up your pelvic floor enough to cross the pain threshold. Now you feel pelvic pain or pain with sex for the first time.
Then you start practicing yoga or learn meditation and your muscles relax. Your pelvic floor dysfunction decreases enough to get you back under the pain threshold. Phew!
Baby fever sets in now that your feeling back to normal and you get pregnant and then you give birth to a child. Or you lose your job, or a parent dies and your pelvic floor muscles tighten again.
At this point, those muscles were already primed for pain and dysfunction.
Now you’re way above the threshold. Pelvic pain is constant or sex without pain seems impossible. Your reaction to the pain is to tighten up more and the cycle continues to get worse.
This is the point where most of my clients seek help and find me.
It’s my job to bring you, not just below the pain threshold, but out of the dysfunction pattern completely. That way, you aren’t living just one event away from returning to pain. My job is to teach you the skills to solve pelvic floor dysfunction. And everything gets better from there.
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