Ways to Build Connection and Intimacy at Home

Published: March 19, 2020

With much of the United States (and world) right now, many families are choosing to stay at home and self-quarantine in the midst of the COVID-19 (Coronavirus) news. Especially now that many schools across the country have closed to help keep the spreading of germs to a minimum, families are now looking at spending some quality time together, at least for the next few weeks. 

My husband and I intend to use this time to challenge ourselves to work on our relationship with each other, and our relationships with our children in a positive, productive way. In these times of uncertainty, it’s so easy to get distracted, let stress get the best of you, and start making decisions that aren’t optimal for you to be the healthiest version of yourself. Maintaining relationships during social distancing is important, but takes some creativity and extra effort, as scary times have the potential to drive people together or apart. 

As we started to put more thought into reconnecting with our family, we also started to brainstorm ways to build connection and intimacy at home, and came up with some great ways couples can do just that. 

Make some Coffee – Especially if the two of you are working from home, getting up early and being the one to make a fresh pot says a lot. While it may not seem like much, doing something small like making the coffee can contribute to the success of your relationship in the long term, as these little acts of kindness make people feel loved in their relationships. This results in a positivity that can help set the tone for the rest of the day. 

Cook a Meal – Whether you opt for lots of ingredients or choose something simple and easy, cooking together is an amazing way to connect with your partner. For one, cooking together requires communication, and if you’re able to get along in the kitchen, it can lead to improved communication altogether. In the end, it’s the thought, love and time you put in together that counts.

Dance in the Kitchen – Or in your living room, bedroom, wherever. Dancing with your partner has a whole bunch of benefits, including exercise, building trust and fostering good communication. Plus, dancing is just fun! Even if you feel silly, it’s the perfect way to break out of your comfort zone and have a good time.

Take a Relaxing Bath – What better way to make sure you’re extra clean than to take a bath together? According to the CDC, all you really need is good old-fashioned soap, but sometimes you need a little help to reach the hard-to-reach places, so it’s best to grab your partner to help. Make a bath even more romantic by adding in your choice of bubbles, bath salts, and a bottle of wine. 

Not a bath kinda gal? Showers work, too, and nothing says “knight in shining armor” like giving her more time under the hot water. 

Get a Massage – From each other, of course. If your Love Language is physical touch (or if your partner’s is), a massage is a perfect way to de-stress, work out any kinks in the body, and just decompress. Plus, getting (or giving) a massage is a great way to build trust and intimacy in your relationship, and you build a stronger bond in the process. The power of touch can signify a feeling of safety; of being less alone, two things that are especially welcomed during these times. And even better, this power stretches both to the partner getting a massage and the partner giving one, so you both benefit. (And then of course, you can swap!) 

Hopefully these are just a few suggestions to help you connect with your partner during any time when you’re at home, but especially over the next few weeks and months as people continue to opt to self-quarantine. And if you’re interested in learning more ways to connect, communicate and strengthen your relationship with your partner, I have years of experience in intimacy coaching in addition to my other specialties in pelvic floor physical therapy, and I would love the opportunity to work with you. Please reach out to see all the ways we can work together!

Update: My book is done and ready for you! Read more about how the things you are doing every day are unintentionally affecting your  libido and intimacy with your partner. Click here for a signed copy of my book or get the book on Amazon.

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Dr. Lauren Crigler.

I specialize in pelvic floor therapy, and have spent over a decade helping women have sex without pain.

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